The ‘Charlotte’s Web’ Fallacy
As you probably have heard by now, last week a cow escaped from a slaughterhouse in Jamaica, Queens, creating the Keystone-cops comical scene of New York’s finest chasing the animal in an attempt to keep the rampaging cow from slamming into buses and such. There had been a similar incident in Astoria in 2000, and after that cow was rounded up and brought to Animal Control, her sentence was commuted and she was sent to an animal sanctuary upstate. Well, it’s happened again.
The Jamaica heifer, now being called “Molly” by the media, has been shipped off to bucolic Suffolk County on the eastern outskirts of Long Island to live out her days on an organic farm. If we had this kind of incentive we’d have run away long ago. Someone needs to make an example out of this cow and eat her.
So now because she has a name and cute little welcome signs she can’t be eaten? This isn’t “Charlotte’s Web.
Molly is simply setting a bad precedent for the other cows in the slaughterhouse—like reverse Judas cow. If they all get it in their bovine brains that running away means reprieve what will become of the meat industry?
The cow should be shipped right back to the slaughter house and butchered. This would restore the order of things. We’ll take a flank, please.
